A Guide for Families

Tips on Visiting Friends and Relatives: The Visit

When people come to visit you, they come to the door and knock or ring the bell. A resident room in a nursing home is an individual's home. Knock before entering and ask permission to enter. If the resident is unable to respond, then announce yourself before walking in.

Greetings usually involve some sort of physical contact, such as hugging or kissing. Touching tells us that we are accepted, human, and desirable. Staff members try, of course, to provide affection, but they can never fill the shoes of the family and friends of the resident. Once in the room, make some form of physical contact unless it is inappropriate.

There are some instances in which you may think visiting is pointless. Visiting is never pointless. Even if a resident is comatose, you should continue visiting. While no one knows exactly what senses remain in a comatose person, we do know that hearing is the last sense to disappear.

Visit, announce yourself, and touch the comatose person as you always have. You may sit by the bedside and hold the resident's hand, stroke the forehead or do whatever is comfortable for you. You can even talk quietly, since the resident may hear what you are saying.

Visits Outside the Nursing Home

Many residents are able to leave the facility for a meal, a day, a weekend, or a vacation. These sorts of outings mean a great deal to them. Visits outside the nursing home reinforce the fact that the resident is still a vital part of family and community. In addition, it may reinforce the benefits the nursing home affords. The benefits of bathrooms and steps that are designed for the elderly or persons with a disability will become readily apparent.

If you are considering taking a resident out of the nursing home, plan first with the resident. Then be sure to tell a staff member, so he can have medicines and special equipment ready. It is wise to give a week's notice if any special arrangements need to be made.

Visiting should be pleasant and enjoyable for family, friends, and the nursing home resident. Plan ahead, involve the resident, and above all: don't let his or her "nursing home resident" status interfere in the wonderful relationship you have always enjoyed.